Piano – The best one to drop on someone?

Sometimes you need to make a decision on how to harm you enemy. This is something that we have covered before on this blog. Well, in part. That time involved anvils. The mainstay of the evil genius’ arsenal of weapons.

The other is the piano. Normally dropped from height. The main question is what sort of piano to use. We have two, well three if you include electronic keyboards. This post will go through each type and try and figure out the best for you.

We will start with the electronic keyboard.

Korg_M1_640_LongThis can only be useful as a melee weapon. It can have a good swing to it but they can be unwieldy if its a full 88 key one. A keytar could be better in this case as they already come with a strap and are easier to wield around. It also won’t make the correct discordant sound of the hammers hitting strings when it finally impacts on the victim, or floor. Not the best for the effect that you are after as electron is do not make the correct plinky noise when it impacts with the victims cranium.

Next is the first of the pianos that are usually associated with the piano drop, the upright.

Upright piano thrown off a roofThis one is very rarely used, unless it is designed to just miss your victim. This is the one used to scare not wound. It doesn’t fall from height well. It’s more used to be dropped down stairs by clumsy removal men, or chimpanzees.

Finally, we hit the perfect type for dropping. It’s large, aerodynamic enough to fall where you want it to go.

That being the grand piano.
Grand PianoThis one does seem to be the mainstay of the cartoon piano drop.  When it does hit it makes the correct sound and then leaves the victim with a mouthful of keys that then can be used to play a short ditty before collapse…